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Comment by Stephanie Wilson on February 27, 2013 at 8:34am

I am having such a hard time after losing my dad. I have so much anxiety now about losing other people close to me because the pain is so bad thay I don't know if I could handle anymore. I had a picture of my mom and dad and my oldest daughter and my grandson by my desk at work. I finally took it down because every time I glanced at it I would start to break down. Why does it have to hurt so much? I'm trying to come out of this lonely place I am at because I know my dad would not want us hurting but it is easier said than done. I am so tired of being sad but I can't help it. What do I do?

Comment by Stephanie Wilson on February 26, 2013 at 5:33pm

I want to thank for the support that I have gotten from those of you who read my post and wrote back to let me know you are here for me. I am having such a hard time feeling joy right now. When my dad passed and the mortuary people picked him up I ran straight to his room and grabbed the pillowcase off the pillow he passed on. I sometimes take it outto feel him and it has his smell still. I would probably freak out if that got lost. There is so many times it takes all I have to get up and start the day. I just really miss my dad and worry about my mom wanting to give. I just pray that one day I can feel better.

Comment by dream moon JO B on February 25, 2013 at 3:32pm

i herd a song on the radio today by boney m daddy koool i started thngimg of my daddy my dad loved ths song 2 he liked boney m wen i woz a tean and bort the bony m album home i dont no who enjoyed it more me or my dad he loved by the rivers of boney m 2 and all the songs thy sung but ths song daddy kool always stick out for me maby it coz im a daddys girl i always will be he allways stood up for me wen people wer having a go at me blaming me for thngs wish proly had noting 2 do wit me but my dad used to sing som silly songs i herd 1 of my dads silly songs the othr day it woz like skip skip skip to the lo skip skip skip ti the lou ski to the lou my darling i no he cudnt sing but he woz always make us laff he shud of bean a stand up comidian wit his jokes and silly songs he wud of gave chris rock a run for his mony the diary i fond the othr day 1991 woz wow i mut of only bean a tean thn now im 38 i wonder wear the yrs ago life seams to move faster wen u get to be adult i dont no if its just me

Comment by dream moon JO B on February 24, 2013 at 3:19pm

sory abot yore loss stephannie me 2 woz close to my dad it hurts so mush tht he is not hear any moreit his anversy coming up the 1st 1 hie died 3rd march 2012 an 220am iv got the same problem 2 dennis i keep geting told by some of the family to but my life on hold i can get a life any tim thy fogot lifes 2 shot or i got told i dont nead a life u can get 1 wen u r older 

Comment by Denise Frappollo on February 24, 2013 at 11:08am

As the one year anniversary approaches of Dad's passing I feel deeply am trying to gather inner strength.  However; I am still so lost without him.

Now I am not sure what to do for Mom, she is extremely needy and I am not complaining but I am concerned.  My husband took me to Disney World for the first time ever this January, I called her every morning to check in on her and share my first moments with her.  The hardest conversation was when we were in the Magic Kingdom.  I called her just as I entering the gates and saw Cinderella's Castle for the first time.  She and Dad always wanted to bring me to see and I wanted her with me when I saw it.  I had not counted on my emotional reaction to seeing it or hers to hearing me see it.  When I came home and went to visit her, Mom cried like a child in my arms.  I promised to never go on vacation again, my heart was broken.  My mother was inconsolable.  She always tells me she does not want me to put my life on hold for her, yet I have gone away three times since Dad's passing and each time when I came home she was sad.  The first was July 4th, we went to NY to visit my husband's father and family as he had not seem them in a few years.  The second was a return trip to NY three days before Thanksgiving because my father in law had passed away we were home for the holiday, and then Disney.  Sometimes I hang up from calling her feeling like the worst daughter ever.  I am so scared she will die of a broken heart.  I do all I can to be there for her but it feels like sometimes I am not doing enough.

Comment by Stephanie Wilson on February 24, 2013 at 8:02am

I am so happy I found this site. I am having such a hard time dealing with my dads death. I know that my other siblings are suffering to. I miss my dad so much he was just a wonderful dad. We did not have much growing up but we knew we had love from our mom and dad. My mom is having a hard time to and I'm afraid she is going to give up and that would hard to. I just am needing an outlet to talk and heal. I just miss my dad so much that I had to step down from my position at work for a while because I was just not caring and the grief is to much. I hope I can meat people here that understand what I am going through. I just miss my dad so much.

Comment by Casandra Porter on February 24, 2013 at 1:58am

Welcome, Stephanie. I know exactly how you feel and I am sorry for your loss. This site, sometimes just knowing that it is here, has helped me tremendously since I lost my father in March 2012. And recently, even though it has almost been a year and my life has continued on, I have found myself upset on many occasions just thinking about him. I hope that you can find the solace you need and support you need from this site, as I have. It's going to be a journey but in time... IN YOUR OWN TIME, you and your mother will heal. Celebrate your father's memory, talking about it makes it better, remember the good things and reminisce often with others. It helps. Best wishes in your journey.

Comment by Stephanie Wilson on February 23, 2013 at 11:23pm

I am new to this site but I hope that I can get through my grief. I lost my dad on December 12,2012. The pain I feel is bad that I feel like I'm going to lose my mind. He was the best dad anybody could want. I stayed the last night with him before he passed and I stayed up all night just watching him sleep. I am have so much depression it is so head. I know he is not suffering anymore but it's still hard. Him and my mom were married 54 years and she is also suffering. I know death is part of life but boy it still hurts.

Comment by dream moon JO B on January 4, 2013 at 3:37pm

this is true dennis som drs r ok and som r not ok iv left my self wit a medical fobia wish is not goood for me having a medical coddidson my self wish i shud take betr care of we did not relize resperty deses runs in the family my dads cuzen told us nevr saw her for ages now she has the big c im out practising my foto taking or my vidio making i can use a camra beter thn a computer a games consol is more eay to use a computer is full of keys and it times its the right keys to type or press link http://vimeo.com/56649684 clip038 embed

Comment by Dennis C. on January 4, 2013 at 11:49am

My wife has had 15 surgeries while battling her cancer. Each one as scary as the next.

It is frustrating when the doctors can't get it right the first time. Frustrating and SCARY.

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