My brother was only 17 when he was shot to death in April. I was finishing my last semester in college, and things were already going so bad. I had been praying to God NON-STOP everyday for things to get better. Instead of getting better, right around my finals week, my brother is killed. What kind of God would let this happen to a family that already went through so much? Why would he ignore my prayers? How can a person pray for things to get better and then they get worse. And I always get the generic responses- "Its God's will" or "God makes no mistakes" People always give God a free pass, when we know deep down inside we only say these things to make ourselves feel better. No one ever stands up to God, why won't anyone question? In reality we do not know what God is up to. I understand people have free will, and people do evil things on their own. However God could protect people. God should at least protect children from being murdered. God loves children so much, he lets them get gunned down in the street for no reason? My brother was not into drugs or gangs, and he had perfect attendance in school. He did nothing to deserve this, and no one else that gets murdered deserves it either. I am about a step away from becoming an atheist. Because not only did God ignore me when I was so loving and devoted, he also put me through worse by not letting my brother survive the shooting, knowing I was already going through too much. But God is so great right?

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Janice,

 

Grief is grief...has nothing to do with either  dad or son.....it is horrible and my heart goes out to you.   i want to reply to you after i get home from my sisters place next week  and i will.  take care for now but remember God is not in a box as many of us humans seem to put Him....boy we are sure bold to do this all the time...heck we would not even be here in the first place if it wasn't for what God desired to create for His joy and pleasure...but I will continue this later...you are still very young living  in a instant society since you were born and we now expect everything A.S.A.P...it is so hard for us when such heavys happen and nothing can be fixed in the next 5 min....talk to you soon.

of course;  you are on par and it is understandable....one of the hardest things in the world for those left behind and it has happened to you twice.

I can see that you are all over the map when it comes to things you have heard and your questions are good but what you are using is not all there.

I still want to send to you input to maybe clear some of that up but it will take time to put it together and I need the time to do it in the midst of what is on my plate.  Hope to soon

Hang in there and draw from those who love you right now.

 

i have thought more on your msg Janice and i have decided to not go into the things you mentioned above because you are so lost and suffering right now and they are just the bandaids of it all.

you need healing of your loss and i thought that i would mention this book i just read last week....you can get it in christian stores but probably also Chapters.

It is called  Heaven is For Real – Todd Burpo is the author.  it will help you so much in your faith and will give you such comfort about your dad and you and just how well he is doing...a 4 yr old boy died and it is what he shared with his mom and dad over the year as things came up....it is amazing and gave me so much comfort and peace and i could rest when it came about my son 100% and know what is around the corner for me and him...so much came out about heaven and how he saw his little sister who he didn't  know anything about before but his mom verified afterwards and his grandad who he did not recognize because he was young but the boy recognized him in one of the pictures his dad showed to him...he is now 11 and his father waited until he was older to bring it out so as to protect his son  by not bringing it all out at such a young age.   hope you get it and let me know if you read this....it will be much more helpful than me going the other route right now with how you are suffering.  Barbara

just get the book....ease your soul for now....and take care of yourself....heart goes out to you...i am noticing as the weeks go on (9 now)  i myself am getting deeper in the valley....feel like i am being sucked down and it has nothing to do with God.....i  have lost my son and his family is falling apart....hard for a grandmother to see and i just can't do anything to fix it....i miss him deeply but we will meet on the other side....there is comfort in some things...now again...read the book...lol

I have heard good things about this book.  

 

hope you read it too.....it will help and will give a clearer picture...hope you get it...let me know

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