i am mad me for bean mad god 

i am so mad at god for stuff he has put us thru  if i sea him or her im worid in i say horble stuff 2 him or her im worid i will puch or slap him or her 

i bleve in god im so mad at god i am i am so mad at him or her

Tags: at, god, mad

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it wud be grt if wz no sufinrin we suffer 2 mush we do coz of deth we do

no pain

yea pease as well

2 sea evry 1 we lost never let go ever again 

its grt we can all hav difrnt vews or sea thngs difernet as well

thnx zell 

we all hear for difrnt resons we r

say if god creted us hears 1 how wz god creatded 

its got me confusd thng abot it

thnx zell u r so clever it ths stuf i lk up 2 sky 2 sea if i can sea god him/her yea im still mad over 2 mush death wish i feal bad abot bean mad i do 

i ask why

wwhy so mush loss

i no say he/she has plans for us but plans i dont lk is loss of loved 1s 

hear is a few pics of sea i luv sea i do 

but loss/death i dont lk 

thnxs zell

thnx zell 

evry t i sea news u sea killers go free or peadafiles go free 

or get a grt lfe in jail i get so mad 

loved 1s we lost suffer nver did any thng bad but suffer big c strokes or so on so not fair i scream why not thm thy deserve it we dont loved 1s of us did not deserve it 

but scum it kill s or peadafiles it hrts kids so on do 

i mnt scum it dose bad stuff lk killers peadafiles rapest so on why do thy not suffer 

loved 1s we lost suffer so do we after thr death so not fairits not

try best we can 2 hlp evry dennis if we can

i no its not only me  

why let kids or loed 1s get big c so not fair

killers peadfiles go free or get a grt lfe in jail it mks me sic it dose 

so not fair

My perspective...my own faith background was christian, I even studied to be a missionary at one time.

 

Now I have two child deaths...my first infant died while I was attending a bible study...he died quietly of SIDS...my second beautiful son, Jesse, was ran over in his own lane while attempting to go to a doctor's appointment. He also gave so much to people and lived with quiet faith in the intrigrity of his own heart. He was struggling with finances, yet when he had a car for sale and a grandmother with a very sick small child needed transportation to get her to a medical facility, he traded away the car for a very bad vehicle. Yes, he knew what he had given away. When his elderly neighbor fell in her driveway during the end of winter, he found her and drove her himself to the medical facility as she was too poor to afford the ambulance charge. He was threatened to be fired by his employer and he told him "Too bad"> The person who ran my son over had no care for anyone, except herself, and has been a juvenile deliquent, smoking weed, having disorderly conduct on her record and all other sort of indiscretions. Yet my son was allowed to die that day at the hands of this person.

He was gentle in his faith and listened to many elderly persons who were in depression. Yet he died a cruel death.

 

Also, my sister in the year 2001 was ran over and flung into the highway and smeared across the pavement. That driver also ran away from the scene and when found, was never charged, our family was left with finding finances on our own for her funeral and burial expenses.

My other only sister then developed a brain tumor and was hospitalized on the day I was leaving from my older sister's funeral. A few years following, my mother developed breast cancer and refused treatment because of her grief. Our family did follow the bible teachings as best as we could and my mother is more spiritual than most church attenders could ever hope to be.

My change in perspective of faith, and things related to it changed dramatically because of the unexpected events leading up to my son's death. I can tell you that there were "warnings" (premonitions) to my son death before it occurred. I am now unsure of everything...and I do not think that God operates like we think or how churches in general think He operates. (I do not like a gender, because most likely God is beyond this). 

I have read enough NDEs to know that most peoples end-of-life/near death experiences are unique as snowflakes on a hill. the premonitions of foreknowing...it is like a double edge sword. I know these things exist...and perhaps have moved more towards a spiritualist view...

 

I have sought some explanation to the events which I did not realize could exist. (And I am ABSOLUTELY mad about not knowing these occurrences could happen but have read enough death literature to know for absolute certainty they do occur) I now believe there are aspects of a person and existence which do not fit into a materialistic mindset and/or cannot be explained by old dogmatic assumptions.

IANDS has been a great resource for me. Yes, the image of God that was taught me is dramatically altered...for me, I believe there is enough evidence of an afterlife though vastly different than what has been maintained by most churches. Or perhaps they have forgotten the origins of their faith, how Jesus in spirit appeared to people for 40 days and that Paul in Acts was taught by Jesus after his death. Many experimenters/researchers are actively researching the area of consciousness surviving death: Dr. Sam Parnia, Bruce Greyson Md, Raymond Moody MD., Pim Van Lommel, the late Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, Johnathan Edwards. I have learned how little is known about these matters, I had only wished I had known more, perhaps it would have made a difference. In our modern day world death is not talked about, it is taboo. In the past when people took care of their own dying loved ones,  they were more in tune to the real events that occur in transition.

 

Just my take on things...I still struggle daily for answers. I awaken every morning and think, "I CAN'T BELIEVE MY SON IS DEAD".  

 

I am only citing my personal experience and knowledge...and many times I have also prayed just to be let go... 

so sorry l r is not fair

i us 2 pay 2 god a lot but 2 mush losss i cnt do it im 2  sad mad so on coz of death 2 mush death

2 mus big c in famly

its not fair for mums dads 2 loss kids its not

i mnt pray not pay 2 god bic c has killed a lot of famly off its 1 evil illness it kills

so not fair

Jo, wanted to say how beautiful your photos are. You have a very good eye for this. I like the swans you took a picture of. Thanks for posting them.

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