Lost my husband 3 weeks ago today suddenly

Three weeks ago tonight I lost my husband of 10 years. He had an unexpected asthma attack that was so severe it caused massive amount of brain damage. I now have three children to take care of and I am trying to be strong for them. But at night I feel so lonely. Then there is Christmas right around the corner. It's just so hard to be in the Christmas spirit.

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Permalink Reply by Cortney on December 16, 2013 at 9:19pm
Thank you nancy and I will be praying for you every night for your loss as well
Permalink Reply by bluebird on December 16, 2013 at 8:54pm

I'm so sorry.  My husband died too, and it is horrible.  I don't know how to be anymore -- I don't want to be, anymore -- so I don't really have any advice for you.  I hope your children give you a reason to live, unless/until you find other reasons to live as well.  Don't feel that you have to make a big deal out of Christmas this year. I'm sure your children are sad as well, so maybe have a low-key holiday, trying to keep it calm and peaceful. 

Permalink Reply by Cortney on December 16, 2013 at 9:27pm
Thank you bluebird. Sometimes advice is not always the answer. Sharing stories and feelings seem to be the best medicine. Christmas will be low key this year. I have got each of my kids something special to help them remember their father.
I want you to keep your head up. There is a purpose for everything. We will get through this.
Permalink Reply by bluebird on December 16, 2013 at 9:29pm

I think it's good that you've gotten each of your kids something special to help them remember their father.  That will probably help them and you.

I don't share your belief that there is a purpose for everything, nor do I want to get through this.  But if you do, then I hope you are able to do so -- it sounds as though you are making a good start. I hope you and your children have a peaceful Christmas.

Permalink Reply by Susan V on December 22, 2013 at 5:42pm

I am touched by your reply. You are hurting deeply, but you reach out to another soul who also is hurting. Thank you for being here. I honor your grief.

Permalink Reply by Susan V on December 22, 2013 at 1:21pm

I cannot imagine how overwhelmed you feel by grief and the responsibility of having the children to try to be present for. Christmas is a really hard time to be going through this. Any time is a hard time, but holidays seem to trigger so many memories and no strength to cope. I hope this group will be helpful in some way.  It was in a Dec. some years ago that I first encountered an online grief support group. My loved one lay dying and I was already in burnout. That group meant a great deal to me since I was in another city, away from friends and support. We are here for each other.

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