It has been three years today that my cousin killed his ex and committed suicide. I am not angry at him anymore, but I still have questions that are unanswered which makes me want to scream sometimes. I can't understand why he would take her with him. If he wanted it to end so badly then he should have left her out of it. I also don't understand it, because he was the last person I would have expected to do something so horrible. I still remember that day so clearly, and I haven't been able to speak to her family. I worked with her sister and brother and I feel like I should have contacted them in some way. I wonder if three years is long enough, or if I should give them more time. I don't know what to do. I want them to know that I love their sister and how wonderful I think she was. I guess I am afraid that if I contact them, then they will be upset with me. Does anyone have any advice?

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I'd contact them if I were you, if it feels uncomfortable, then backoff, but you are not the one at fault.
I would contact them too.
I think that no matter the situation, it is always a good thing for family members to hear  that you loved the person that they lost. I know when someone walks up to me and tells me how much they miss my husband's voice or his smile or his just being around, it makes me feel better to know that someone else loved him and misses him too. I would go and tell them...there is an old saying that "Hurt people hurt people," but I am trying to change that to "Hurt people help people." One step at a time...one day at a time.

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