I feel guilty

For as long as we were together David suffered from indigestion or heartburn and was always eating tums, occasionally he would have a spell were he didn't feel good and would lay down for a few minutes, after a while it would pass and he would feel ok again. We got used to these spells and never really had them checked out by a doctor, which I guess we should have because it turned out to be his heart and it ended up killing him. Even thou I am a nurse we never went to doctors and now I have incredible guilt for not recognizing the signs of an attack. 

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Permalink Reply by anna l. on May 20, 2012 at 9:14pm

Helen Im very sorry for your loss.  It is hard when we think there was more we could have done or wished we had done differently.  I also think most of us here have guilt for many reasons.  It is such a part of grief.  Try to be easy with yourself. 

Permalink Reply by Helen Roberts on May 20, 2012 at 9:20pm
I feel overwhelmed when I think of my future, we were looking forward to retirement and had made many plans, now I see no future and don't want to go on alone.
Permalink Reply by Helen Roberts on May 20, 2012 at 9:20pm
I feel overwhelmed when I think of my future, we were looking forward to retirement and had made many plans, now I see no future and don't want to go on alone.
Permalink Reply by anna l. on May 21, 2012 at 1:48am

Same here.  My husband would have been 65 in July 2011 and I had told him he needed to slow down the work so we could do more things together.  We joked about it all the time.  He was a workaholic and it would have been a hard transition for him to make but we had such plans.  To travel.  To spend more time with our grown children and grandchildren.  And then cancer destroyed all those plans, in two short months.  It has been almost a year of being alone for me now and things have gotten better.  I have learned how to do so many things that just overwhelmed me at first.  I dont miss him one single bit less, but I do see being able to go on alone as possible now.  I still refuse to even talk about any travelling and have avoided all weddings up to now.  Some things are taking longer than others.  I feel so bad for you because I can remember so clearly being just where you are now.  The numbness was wearing off and the full understanding of all I had lost was crashing in.  Take care, Anna

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