how do i release the hate?

on 3-21-08 my daughter was shot and killed. since then i have become the stereo type biker. no 1 used to mess with me or my family for fear of what i will do to them. after this i am openly hostile. i want to go to the execution to see his mom cry and follow them home and turn his family tree into a stick. i have become scarry to bikers i ride with. i really need help but i have noone to talk to. so it just builds. i frequently find myself flying into blind rages. i am dying inside i can feel it i do not care. as long as i see him die first ill be ok. see i need help badly. any takers i just need to vent. im not as crazy as i sound im a well thought of person by my peers. thats the worst part. and im not going to do anything im just hurt to my core.

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Permalink Reply by fred upton on May 28, 2009 at 11:50am
im sorry for your loss i know you are a better person than i am easily. if i had the kid that shot my daughter in reach i know exactly how he would meet god. id express his meeting date. gods proven hes turned on us all. i have always swallowed the bible bs but im over that now. reality says... ...its a new world kill or be killed. you dont want to shoot her huh? ok you want her hurt up i got female friends thatd be glad to hit her with pipes untill she ran to the police to confess. you know i just got a new job idea. confession extractors. well ok th name needs work but the idea has merrit
Permalink Reply by healing07 on July 3, 2009 at 6:23am
I m so sorry for that your daughter killed. I know its the awful time for you. Its the horrible loss for you. You miss your daughter because you loved her. My friend also suffered from this situation and she also cry all the time.
I know its difficult to deal with this grief. You should go to grief counseling community. Its the best place to deal with your pain and grief. My condolences for you and my prayers always with you.

condolences
Permalink Reply by Serena Ellis on August 25, 2009 at 1:19am
My heart totally goes out for you and I feel so sorry for your daughter. its really a terrible loss and difficult to accept it. I know its tough time for you but you should go to grief counseling for relief your pain. Loss of a child is very painful for parents. My friend also lost her child last year and she was also very confused from it.
I pray to God for relief your pain. My prayers and condolences for you.
(((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))

condolence message
Permalink Reply by Starr edwards on July 12, 2011 at 7:45am
Fred I can't say I understand completely my son 
Wasn't shot he was tan off the road being chased
And they won't do anythingeven tho the man admitted
He was following him they don't care is what I have figured out
It's not there child. So I live ten miles from this man and have to do nothing that
Suppose to do nothing . So I hold in te anger . I have 
Broke a few cups and glasses tho . Hugs to you Hun.
Permalink Reply by Samantha Nicole Curry on July 21, 2011 at 3:30am

I haven't gone through and read what others have said so I hope I am not repeating anything.  I can only tell you how I got my hate out and what works for me and hopefully it can help u.  I have an anger journal that I actually keep locked in a safe because then I know it is ok for me to write anything in it even if it is inappropriate.  When I am overwhelmed with hate or I am really upset I take it out and write everything that I feel about whomever and whatever.  Sometimes I cry and get it all out and sometimes I can't even write.  But it is a release and it does help if you give it a try more than once. 

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