Not looking forward to Christmas
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Does anyone write to the person you have lost?
I lost my grandma in May and it has been so hard to deal with. She helped raise me and I was closer to her than I am to my mom. I've been studying abroad since August and while I've been gone I've wanted to share everything with my grandma. I've experienced so much and I know she would have loved to hear the stories and gossip and to have seen what I bought, however I know she can't. So instead I've begun writing a journal to her. I write it as if I was talking to her, adding things we would've laughed about and that she would have wanted to known about and seen. It has helped some. Although I know she's not going to be able to read it, it helps me think that she knows, that I've told her first especially since she always hated knowing something last, had to have the gossip and news first. I don't know if anyone else has written like this, but it's a suggestion, it might help some.
Tags: Writing, lost, loved, my, one, to
Views: 199
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Julie Smith on
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Hi Katie, I just found this sight tonight. I love the fact that you write to your Grandma in your journal. My Mom had a facebook page before she died and my sisters and I have kept it open. I go to it sometimes and write as though she can read it. I always say things like I know you are very busy and don't have time to write but I wanted to share something with you. And so I write everything I want to say to her. I find it healing in my heart.
Your suggestion is very good. I think it is very healing to journal.
Blessings to you Katie. I am sorry for the loss of my Grandmother. I feel your pain.
Julie
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Permalink Reply by Katie Vaughan on
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Thank you for your kind thoughts Julie. I have friends who have lost classmates that write on their facebook pages still. It's very nice that you still write to your mother, I hope that it is helping you.
Best wishes.
Katie
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It is nice how everyone is responding with the same thought of how good and healing it is to keep journaling or writing to our loved one. I deleted the picture of my Mom and I from your link. This link is for you and not about posting my Mom and I. Have a good and pleasant night Katie.
Blessings to you.
Julie
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Permalink Reply by penny on
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hi katie,
yes i write to my husband on a daily basis--sometimes 2-3 times a day--i lost my wonderful husband on may 8th of this year--totally unexpected--and this has been very hard on me--so go ahead and keep writing to your grandma--cuz you never know she just might be reading it--for i like to think that my husband is able to read what i write to him
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Permalink Reply by Cindy on
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I write to my sweet Les every day. He was my finace and he passed away on Sept 12, 2010. I find it healing to write letters, like he can read them. I think those who are gone from this world are still with us as spirits and they know our hearts.
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Permalink Reply by Toyanne on
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Hi Katie my mom just passed away this last May and what I did is I wrote a letter to her and went up to her grave site and read it to her. It helped also what I do is that I look at her picture everyday and I say hi to the picture. It's going to be hard on Thanksgiving because it's also my birthday
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Permalink Reply by Marcia Hulsizer on
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Hi Katie. My daughter died suddenly in July. I keep her posted about her children and what's going on with the family on her facebook page. It helps me a little bit. Her brothers and numerous friends also go to her facebook page, just to leave a note every so often. Stay strong.
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Thank you everyone for writing here. It does help to know that I'm not the only one writing to their loved ones. It has been very difficult for me since my grandma passed away. I haven't had an outlet to talk about memories of her or to get my feelings out. As much as my friends have tried to be helpful, I find it hard for them to really understand unless they've lost someone close, which is why I'm very glad I found somewhere I am able to talk and have people know what I am going though, it's starting to help me. Although now I am trying to deal with more issues that have come up, my uncIe passed away two weeks ago and my grandpa just got diagnosed with cancer. I feel like this year just keeps getting worse. Hopefully things will look better with the new year.
I am very sorry for all of your losses.
Best wishes.
Katie
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Permalink Reply by DINESE DAM on
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My sister died in July of this year. I miss her dearly. I in fact do write to her. It is the best thing to do for ourselves. I also write to my mom and dad. Sometimes I even sent my letters to heaven.
The first Christmas after my father died, a wise 6 year old boy ( my grandson ) says to me, " Grandma what am I gonna be able to get Grandpa and Grandma for Christmas? And how will they get it? " Well I just told him that I would have to think about that and I'd let him know. Well later on that night, he came to me and said he knew what we could do. He was so excited to tell me. He went to tell me that we would have to go the store and by one of those baloons that they put helium in. But before we did that, we each had to write a note and then he said we needed to go get the baloon and put the notes in the baloon before they put the helium in. After that, him and I went to a place that was wide open and sent the baloon off to heaven. He said now they will get it.
I was so proud of him....
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Katie, I lost my 19 y/o son in a car accident several years ago. I remember that on his birthday each of us in our family, my husband, daughter, and myself wrote notes and took the notes to the cemetery. We tucked them in his flower arrangement. It made me very sad, but I think it may have helped some. In that I could not give him a birthday present, but I could write him a note. At least it was a remembrance. I think your idea of a journal to your grandmother is good. Writing is very therapeutic. Best wishes pat.
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Permalink Reply by Jessica Manning on
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I write letters to my dad. He died May 3rd 2010 and I write to him on occassion. Depends on the day. But yes I do write letters to the one I've lost.
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Permalink Reply by Diane Grell on
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Yep I write to my husband all the time. When I get mad I yell at him on paper. My husband died on 1/6/09 as a result of smothing meth. So yes, I am pissed he died that way. I am pissed he did this to himself, me, the kids. And Yes, I have a journal at home I write to him. When I'm done writing, sometimes I see or figure out what it was that I had gotten so angry over. I also have his urn in by bedroom, with his picture on it. I also talk to that as well.
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